My least favorite four-letter words

There are a lot of four letter words that make me cringe. Too many naughty ones peppered in a conversation, movie, or blog post I'm reading turns me off. I can recognize the humor in a few well-placed ones, and I did enjoy a raunchy variety show with Hubby while on a recent trip to Las Vegas (complete with lots of cosmopolitans). While I'm not a total prude when it comes to naughty words, I don't choose to use them very often myself. I feel guilty when I do.

But there are some totally harmless four-letter words that really have my panties in a bunch lately.

The first one is: MOVE.

Say that and people who have moved instantly give you the pity eyes and the sympathy sigh. (You instantly get tons of unwanted advice and unhelpful commentary on how quickly someone else's house sold, too. GAH!)

Moving tests everything you know to be true: the strength of your marriage, the creativity of your decorating style, and the solidity of your ability to multitask and organize.

I'm so tired. I'm tired of trying to pack with a toddler following me around saying, "Don't pack that away, Mommy!" I'm tired of trying to keep the messes of four young boys and their sloppy father contained because we could have a showing at a moment's notice. I'm tired of yelling at them when the stress of it all gets to me. I'm mostly tired of wasting entire days cleaning and organizing my house to perfection for a showing only to receive feedback that the potential buyers, "Liked the house and thought it showed really well, but they are not putting in an offer because of some XYZ stupid thing."

And it's Christmas time and we don't have any decorations or lights up, and that kills me.  

The next four-letter word is: LICE.

It's safe to say that one gives everyone the heebie jeebies. Even my mother, who has seen her fair share of hard times and is very logical about everything, said, "Oh my god, Kathy, I am so sorry!"

I always believed lice to be more of of girl mom problem - all that hair and that sharing of hats and bows and girly-things. Hubby and I have said that if our boys got lice, we'd take 'em in the backyard and shave 'em down.

Yeah, that doesn't work on a little three-year-old who won't let anyone touch his head.

We just happened to be at the barber when I opened the e-mail saying that lice had been found on one of Edgie's preschool classmates. I laughed - laughed! - as I read it aloud to the barber. He kept saying Edgie would go last, and I just thought it was because he howls so loudly while getting his hair cut that the barber wanted to wait until the offices across the hall cleared out for the day.

But it was because he knew my long-haired sweetie's curls would have creepy crawlers. All the way to the drugstore I kept itching my head even though Lou, the barber, said I didn't have them. But seriously, did something just bite my back?!?!

My poor little boy screamed and cried so hard while I was treating his hair that he vomited. When we were done, he looked at me with his big blue sad eyes and said, "Mommy, do I still have lice?"

I cancelled a house showing for the next day while I stripped all the sheets and quilts and washed them and vacuumed down the couch and throw pillows (even though the school nurse told me that, like any parasite, lice need a live host to survive so doing all that isn't necessary). Even though he was declared lice-free by the school nurse, I'm still cautious. Murphy's Law tells me this isn't over.

And I sit here ready to cry over it all. I'm spent - emotionally, physically, mentally. As I drove away from my lemon-scented and freshly tidied house yesterday before the showing, I prayed to Saint Joseph (the patron saint of home sales). Really, I begged him: Please let someone love our house. I know we have been yelling at each other a lot lately, and I know Joey died there; but there is so much wonderful energy there, too. I thought of the dance parties and the Easter egg coloring and Christmas cookie decorating and the pumpkin carving. I thought of the blanket forts that have been built and the stories that have been read and the new babies that have been cuddled in that house. I thought of the brotherly love and the family gatherings and all the birthday parties. I know someone will love it. And I just need to keep my eyes on our new home and all the wonderful possibilities it holds for the future.

Then I was thinking about all of the more important four and five letter words that truly deserve my disdain. Lice and moving - these will pass; but what of the issues that never seem to go away?

Guns (and the violence that people create with them)

People are really suffering over these words, these concepts that dig a hole too deep to crawl out of. The sadness and anger that these words create in people permeate our society and divide its citizens.

A few years ago, when friends would complain their woes to me, at some point they would stop short. With wide eyes they would make this disclaimer: But, it's nothing compared to what you're going through (you know, meaning the cancer). I would say to them, But you only know what YOU'RE going through, and it's hard, too. 

What I'm going through is nothing compared to what some people are suffering with right now. Yes, it's hard and it sucks, but I still need to remember that "this too shall pass." I need to remember to have empathy and understanding for other people and their problems. I need to not be so consumed with my own misery that I turn a blind eye to others.

There's no denying that certain words evoke certain emotions in us. Hopefully the one emotion that is created in us all is empathy. 


Around the Pond with the Frog~October/November 2014

December 1st already!  Where does the time go? Time is definitely going to fly between now and Christmas. In case you've missed anything that's happened here around the pond, here it is summed up in one convenient place.

I sort of fell off the blogging wagon in October. I wrote about our upcoming move and how I hate change. I also shared my inclusion in the latest Chicken Soup for the Soul book, Chicken Soup for the Soul: Find Your Inner Strength: 101 Empowering Stories of Resilience, Positive Thinking, and Overcoming Challenges. I'm so honored to have been included in one of these well-loved and timeless books. It would make a great gift for anyone this holiday season. Finally, I stopped by Coach Daddy's blog for another of his wonderful 6-word posts - this one on how we'd spend Hermit Day.

Early in November, I was struck hard by the death of Brittany Maynard, the young woman who had a brain tumor similar to Joey's. I quickly lightened the mood by reviewing my friend Nikki's series of children's books called The Peppermints. These would also make a great holiday gift for the kids on your list.

National Children's Grief Awareness Week was at the end of November, so I shared some personal experience by giving 10 Tips for Talking to Children About Death and sharing The Best Grief and Grieving Resources for Children. The holidays can be an especially hard time for anyone who is grieving. Please share these if you know someone who can be helped by them.  

Finally, I asked and they answered: I shared some Christmas gifts that teachers actually want. Now get out there and get shopping!

December is such a busy time for everyone, and it's going to seem even shorter this year with Thanksgiving being later. It's going to fly for us, as we are finally moving at the end of the month! It's supposed to happen five days before Christmas, but there's still a lot of work to do on our house. I really have to get busy packing, so I probably won't be around blogging or on Facebook very much. 

January will mark FOUR years that I have been blogging and writing. That seems so crazy to think about. Read my very first blog post here to see how the whole thing got started. Throughout the month, I will take a trip down memory lane and share some old posts with you and for the people who have found me along the way. I might write something new; but in case I'm too busy with the move, I wanted to give you something to read. It's kind of a crazy time for me right now, and packing is hard because, you know, I have "help."

"But it's fun, Mommy!" #nothelping

Anyway, I hope that you have a joyous and safe holiday season. If you are shopping on Amazon or ModCloth, I hope you'll consider coming back here and clicking the links above to the right. I earn a little bit of an affiliate commission if you buy something after clicking on those or some of the links above in this post. I will talk to you again soon, Dear Readers. 
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